Why I Won’t Use AI

If you own a business, chances are you’ve seen some of the numerous think pieces about how artificial intelligence is the future of marketing. They promise that it’s creative and it will convert. They say all the top companies are doing it. They say it’s faster and smarter.

But here’s the thing. AI doesn’t ‘create’ anything. Artificial as in imitation. Copied. Reproduction. False. Synthetic. Pretend. Simulation.

In farming circles, AI stands for artificial insemination. But either way, if you’re using AI, someone is getting fucked.

AI works by processing all the data it can find on any given subject, then using algorithms to identify common patterns and features. It then manipulates that data until it produces something ‘new’.

And what ‘data’ is AI manipulating? Existing creative work.

AI trawls the internet to find things created by artists and writers, and changes it enough to skirt copyright laws. In essence, it appropriates someone else’s work, and passes it off as something new. And maybe it’s the teacher in me, maybe it’s the academic, or maybe it’s that I don’t like people getting fucked over- but that smells like plagiarism to me.

The fact is, AI relies on the uncredited and unpaid work of writers and artists. Like me.

And while I’m not worried that I’ll be replaced by a robot any time soon, it does grate me to think that every time I create something unique for a client, it’s helping the robot get better at it too. Because I bet the people who own the robot aren’t struggling to make their mortgage payments.

And I am yet to see anything ‘created’ by AI that’s any good. AI learns from patterns, which means it scans existing creative work, collects all the similar bits, and spits out a generic, de-personalised, repetitious word salad.

Example: one of my clients had a play with ChatGPT. I have removed her business name, service and tagline, but otherwise left the copy as is.

“Are you seeking [service] in your community? Look no further! Introducing [name of business]! No matter what your needs are, we’ve got you covered. Your satisfaction is our priority. Contact us to find out how we can help you achieve your dreams! [business name] has earned its positive reputation because we go out of our way to provide truly exceptional service to each of our customers. With nearly three years of experience, we understand that your needs can change last minute, and we’re ready to adapt our services quickly to ensure the best outcome possible.”

Can you guess what her business is? Do you even want to find out?

What could anyone possibly learn about your business from that bit of word vomit? It’s so generic, it’s not going to resonate with your customers. There’s no personal touch. There’s no effort to connect. There’s no relationship building or flair. It’s boring.

At the end of the day, AI is unable to connect or communicate in any meaningful way because no matter how smart it gets, it will always be stupid. It’s consumed most of the data on the internet, and it’s figured out what human language should sound like, but it will always be a robot.

And that robot is incapable of relating meaningfully to us because it’s just a sad echo of our collective stupidity. It understands how to make itself sound intelligent, but that doesn’t mean it actually is intelligent.

There is no substitute for genuine human connection. Humans working their guts out for minimum wage while robots write poetry and make art is not the world I want to live in.

So please say no to using AI for your marketing and say yes to connecting with your community.

And if you need a hand with that, I’m happy to help.